There are moments where I just get home from work, life or just anything in general and I just feel exhausted. I almost feel numb. Sometimes I stare at the floor or the ceiling for a few minutes. That all depends on if I am lying on my stomach or my back. It just feels so good to not think about anything and just let my thoughts float.
It’s a moment where the entire day and the thoughts you have are absent for once. As strange as it sounds, it feels amazing. It’s my way of catching up, catching my breath, and giving myself a break.
I love to stay busy. I know this because when I am bored or have nothing to do I either get depressed or I do something. Anything. I could endup cooking some food. Going for a walk. Start writing a new song. Start writing a blog post. Grab my camera and shoot some photos. Call a friend. Etc. Etc. Etc.
If I’m not busy I get afraid. I fear that I am not trying hard enough. That if I am behind schedule I will pay for it later in life. I am so paranoid that I am not doing enough for my own well being.
Then those moments pass. I pick myself up. I figure out how to get out of that horrible mood and move on. I move on because life is too short to wallow in our own shame, our own fear and sadness.
People depend on you. You depend on you. Just bite your lip, smile and keep on living. Be happy for what you have. It’s all you’ve got and it’s probably more than you will ever really need.
This is me being brutally honest with the internet.
This is my internal forum.
I published this post with Desk PM.
